Faith, Life, Nourished
I spent the last two days resting and refueling, not like I usually do either. This was serious downtime!
It was a few days ago that one of my main guides came to me and suggested I take these two days to seriously disconnect from this world and reconnect with myself and the spiritual realm. You all know that this year has been especially stressful given what was happening in my financial life, a rather large work change, plus the 365 Disney adventure, and lastly, I moved for the first time in five years… there’s been a lot going on! And I’ll admit, I was worn thin and disconnected from my spirit life more than I have been in the last few years. So I agreed. I said, fine I’m all yours.
And I meant it...
My battle with food and fat has been lifelong.
As the child of a single parent who rarely worked, food was simply not something we had in the house. I remember wondering at one point why my mother didn’t love us enough to steal bread like I’d heard some other people had done. I remember many meals of nothing more than mustard and bread. I remember throwing together strange mixes of food pantry finds to try and make something satisfying for my sister and I. But on the whole, food was a rarity.
I remember being so hungry I just wanted to die from it. I remember getting a diagnosis of malnutrition once, I was probably thirteen or so, and m family laughed, joking that I was the fattest malnourished person on the planet...
Recently the Sun squared Chiron, and while I try to stay aware of transits and alignments, I wasn’t really expecting this one to pack the punch it did.
I couldn’t have been more wrong.
Chiron is symbolized by the “wounded healer”. It represents our deepest wound, and our efforts to heal the wound. Chiron was named after the centaur in Greek mythology who was a healer and teacher who, ironically, could not heal himself.
In Greek mythology, Chiron was held to be the superlative centaur amongst his brethren, as he was called as the wisest and justest of all the centaurs. Chiron willingly gave up his immortality for the life of Prometheus, and for that reason, his half-brother Zeus took pity on him and thus placed him among the stars in the sky to be honored.
Chiron is here to teach us ab...
A life of faith is not a cake walk.
Following your dreams, the calling on your soul, it’s not for the faint of heart.
I’ve read my bible cover to cover, more than once. I never expected it to be easy. Still, it’s the path that calls me and it’s the path I freely choose and I don’t regret that not for one second.
I’m in a serious bind as I write this, I’m $200 short for rent, a fairly regular occurrence these days if I’m honest. And every month I say, this is the last month, and every month I work harder, I chase down more leads, I wrestle and scramble and finagle and pick up odd jobs… and every month, no matter how hard I work, I end up about $200 short. When one source of income goes up, another goes down...
Reality is a question of perspective. Salman Rushdie
Some people will tell you perspective doesn’t change reality, but in my experience, reality is all perception. In the past five years or so I’ve seen how keeping a positive mindset and having faith in the God of my knowing changes everything. I’ve seen miracles these past five years, unlike anything I’ve ever seen in my life before. I very often feel like my entire life these days is a reenactment of Peter walking on water. If I take my eyes off of Christ, if I doubt my faith, I sink. But so long as I keep my mind strong and set in my faith, life is beyond surreal, beyond vibrant, beyond my wildest imagination.
Still, there is a certain anxiety that comes from a life lived on faith that most will never understand...
My story, like many of yours, takes on many twists and turns and has many layers. My story actually includes three men, three relationships and, if I’m honest, starts at an ending.
I won’t go into too much detail on this part, but in the early afternoon in January 2011 my entire world came crashing in.
I was faced with one of my worst nightmares and I went down hard.
For several months after that, I could barely move. I was in shock. I remember not being able to get warm. I remember not even crying… just staring at nothing. I was living almost in a cave as I rarely left a sofa that was set up under a loft bed. I had a lamp, a TV, my pillows and blankets… and I laid there. Sort of waiting to die.
It was certainly one of the darkest times of my life, and I will tell you without a doubt that ...
Though Florida is in the middle of a nasty drought that’s wreaking havoc with wildlife and brush fires, in the past week we’ve started to see a return to our regular afternoon rainfall. I was at Magic Kingdom on one such day to stream, but once the rain starts, it’s very hard to stream because my phone doesn’t like water. That being said, I didn’t call it a day and run home, though I will admit to you that I wanted to. I’ve been struggling a lot lately with depression and anxiety and each day is quite honestly a battle, but I didn’t leave. I hunkered down at Cosmic Ray’s where I watched the clouds roll in.
Despite I had started out my day rather strong, several well-intentioned lectures on how I live my life that day had brought me right back down into the darkness...
This life is such a long journey and I’ve been through several incarnations along the way. I did the Disney obsessed, quiet lonely youth part, the dutiful good Christian wife part, the homeschooling mother. I had the “I’m done with you God because I keep getting hurt by your people” season, I’ve done the author thing where I wrote a lot of erotic romances and got called every name in the book and my own mother disowned me. I’ve done the new age thing to a degree, I made my living for a time doing spiritual counseling and oracle readings and helped so many people I was just awed by God every single day...
Despite declaring herself very firmly “Not a princess” during the film, Moana has easily become one of my favorite Disney Princesses as the 16-year-old is chosen by the ocean to reunite the Heart of Tehiti and save her people.
I was invited to the press screening for Moana and let me say there isn’t anything I don’t love about this movie.This is a film about worth and fulfilling destiny, about believing in yourself and not giving up, despite the odds or the appearance of what you’re facing. It succeeded in all the places Frozen failed for me and I’m completely in love with it.
Moana is beautiful in spirit and brave of heart...
I’m not even sure where to start this post. Last night was night three of Firework Fest and it was amazing for so many reasons. Wishes is just a magical display mixed with a magical soundtrack and anytime you get to see it, you’re blessed. I got to see Celebrate the Magic twice, I spent the three days with a new friend and the relationship deepened exponentially for the time spent. And I just had more fun in these past three days than I almost ever have. I mean we’re talking about being 12 and it’s your first time at the parks kind of fun. I rarely get to feel that way and I want to remember that feeling for a very long time.
The parks at night, of course, are just indescribable...